Great post! Thanks.
I feel that the way I stay nice but not too nice is to be very OPEN. In most of the situations above, I will try to say the truth even if it may hurt some colleague's feeling. I always feel that it's better for long run to gentally let a friend know her/his problem instead of fixing the problem for her/him. It may take a lot of time to communicate and wait, or even sometimes it hurts the relationship, but after a while, people will know your good intention.
其实在工作中我也是个讲话比较直率的人,所以有的时候觉得不知道是不是在不知不觉中已经得罪了好多人. 对于有些人我是确切的知道我得罪他了,只是我不在乎. 但是有些人我就不希望因为言辞措句的原因而伤害到工作中的关系.
我是这么想的, 如果我的目的是要让自己的意见被别人接受, 那么我就应该在不放弃原则的立场下, 找到最能让对方接受的方式来表达. 虽然这也许不是自己最擅长最comfortable的方式,但是这种取舍我愿意承受. 至于我不在乎的那类人,公事公办,对事不对人,就完了.